Kyle: “When Liz and I got married, we felt God’s intent for us was to lay down our lives and consider others more important than ourselves. We prayed for God to use our marriage to care for and support others, but God didn’t answer in a way we would’ve expected.
“The first five years of marriage were equally exciting and excruciating. We moved to help a new church, and God used us in incredible ways. Together, we helped with leadership development, helped people identify and deploy their spiritual gifts, and served in a variety of hands-on ways. It was great, but there was a constant cloud of infertility looming over our marriage. We wanted to start a family, but God wasn’t opening that door.”
Liz: “I was frustrated. Before Kyle and I got married, I didn’t want kids. I’m Type-A, outspoken, direct, and career-focused, which I thought clashed with motherhood. But as I dug into God’s Word, it felt like he flipped a switch in me to desire raising children.
“So, as Kyle and I navigated the grief of infertility, I really wrestled with God: Why would he change my desire if he wasn’t going to fulfill it? I began to approach the Lord with a lot more honesty. I knew that if Christ died and rose again to bring us back into right relationship with him, I could bring him all of my thoughts and emotions. This wildly changed my view of prayer. Prayer isn’t just about telling God what you want from him but cultivating a deeper relationship with him through vulnerable conversation.
“I took all of my grief and doubts to Shiloh, Watermark’s ministry for couples experiencing infertility or miscarriage. As I wrestled, I kept coming back to one question, ‘Here’s what God’s Word says. Do you believe that to be true?’ Our pain was deep and felt invisible, but if I believed the Bible was true, I had to believe that God was good.”
K: “At that point, it was just the two of us in a house we bought for our family. I was also learning a lot about prayer during this time. The Lord worked in my heart to shift my prayers from asking, ‘God, fix our circumstances,’ to ‘God, let me be okay with this and help us steward it well.’ Then, God led us to host Shiloh and filled our house with community.”
L: “When I got pregnant with our son Jonathan, we were overjoyed. But it didn’t erase the grief of all the years of infertility: As Proverbs 30:15-16 (NLT) says, ‘There are three things that are never satisfied—no, four that never say, “Enough!”: the grave, the barren womb, the thirsty desert, the blazing fire.’ The pain of infertility was unrelenting, yet God saw us and comforted us in it.”
K: “We were both working from home and had a lot of really sweet family time. It was great, but there were a lot of other hard things going on in the background—our house was flooded, and our storage unit was robbed. In all of this, God continued to remind us that when everything is stripped away, all that matters is the truth and goodness of the gospel.”
L: “We started to notice that Jonathan was missing some developmental milestones, then we got his genetic diagnosis. We blamed ourselves, and all of the doubts from wrestling with infertility resurfaced. But we reminded ourselves that God was the one who made Jonathan differently, and he is faithful. He was being intentional with our family.”
K: "God is doing incredible things in Jonathan. He has a love for Jesus, for church, and for the Bible that I have never seen before, and he can memorize Scripture like no other. Even though he has trouble communicating, we have clearly noticed that God has given him the spiritual gift of seeing people. He is incredibly empathetic and has a unique ability to brighten people’s demeanors.
L: “Though discipling our son looks different, we have been reminded that the nonessentials are truly nonessential, and all God asks is that we be faithful. If all Jonathan knows is that Jesus loves him so much he died and rose again for him, and that Mommy and Daddy love him, that’s all that matters.
“Jonathan loves the Additional Care for Kids ministry at Watermark and adores his Buddy, a volunteer named Karis. It has blessed Kyle and me by enabling us to worship with our church family, trusting that Jonathan is not only safe but overjoyed in his class.”
K: “Having a son with additional needs has also allowed us to access unique people and spaces. God has shown us that this unexpected ministry is to care for those who are serving in those spaces and to advocate for Jonathan in a way that still leaves the aroma of Christ, our greatest Advocate.
“Even though every day is still hard, we’ve learned the importance of being faithful where God has placed us. Now, though life isn’t what we expected, we know that doesn’t change the fact that God is still good, and he is continuing to work in incredible ways.”
Watermark’s Additional Care ministry offers an inclusive environment where kids, students, and adults with special and additional needs are encouraged, cared for, and taught about Jesus.
Shiloh offers a safe place for couples experiencing infertility or miscarriage to process, connect with others on a similar journey, and find biblical support.